I’m a popped balloon lying on the ground. All because of two
little antidepressants. Let us call them AD1 and AD2. I was forced to stop AD1
in September because of a chance it caused a seizure. After that I felt like a
deflated balloon. Slowly all my energy and positivity were leaving me. Then I
started AD2 which killed the balloon completely. I have no energy. Can barely
get through work. Not getting any school work done. I’m in bed whenever I have
a chance. I can’t live this way much longer.
While I was writing this I was getting quite worked up and
angry. So I spoke to the on call psychiatrist. She said it was fine to stop
taking AD2. I told her I wanted to take AD1 again. She thinks it is fine but I
need to talk to my actual psychiatrist. Who
I’m thinking will allow it. So woo hoo!
The doctor I spoke with today warned me to relax. She said I
was talking too fast and getting worked up over nothing. It may have been
nothing to her, but all this has seriously caused me to have to slow down. I’m
now behind and need to catch up again. I need to be more aware of my life at
home, be more focused at work, and be able to stay awake to do homework. Being
tired doesn’t fit in this life.
What’s on the agenda for tonight? Homework, wine, and
another episode of Homeland!!
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